When she is caught in the backseat
of a car with her older brother's best friend - Deanna
Lambert's teenage life is changed forever. Struggling
to overcome the lasting repercussions and the stifling
role of "school slut," she longs to escape
a life defined by her past.
One morning in August, I
walked in on my dad in the kitchen. He looked up and
then back at the coffeepot. This is how it had been
for weeks: us avoiding each other, tiptoeing around
the house, peeking around corners to make sure the
other wasn’t there. I went past him and got
down a box of cereal and a bowl. I poured the milk
and turned around. Dad
was standing there holding a spoon, which he held
out to me. “Here.”
I took it and sat down.
He stayed standing with his National Paper mug, eyes
on the floor. “So school starts soon I guess,”
he said.
“Yeah. Two more
weeks.” I watched him, in his striped auto parts
shirt and fresh crew cut, looking like Darren.
“Well. You get
some tough classes junior year, right? Might be hard
to keep your grades where you had them.”
“Maybe.”
He dumped out his coffee
and rinsed the mug, placing it carefully on the hook
near the sink. “Your mom said you’ve been
saving your paychecks. Maybe we can find you an old
car.”
He walked out of the kitchen
without waiting for my reply, back straight.
I smiled.
A spoon held out. A question
about school. The possibility of an old car.
It came down to the smallest
things, really, that a person could do to say I’m
sorry, to say it’s okay, to say I forgive you.
The tiniest of declarations that built, one on top
of the other, until there was something solid beneath
your feet. And then…and then. Who knew?
